Why the fuck do people ask me for advice then not take it? I don't understand. I'm a pretty common-sensical type person. I usually tell it like it is. I've been around the block a time or two. And as an added bonus, I've even fucked up royally and learned from my mistakes (mostly). So, when I've got something to say about something I may have a clue about... TAKE MY FUCKING ADVICE. I dole these golden gems out by the buttload for free, y'all. And, this shiz is priceless!
If you're the type of person who has a hard time deciphering between good and bad advice, maybe this will help:
BAD ADVICE: Just be yourself.
GOOD ADVICE: Pluck your fucking eyebrows, shave your legs, squeeze into a pair of spanx, suck on a mint and wear a push-up bra.
BAD ADVICE: Get all the facts straight before reacting.
GOOD ADVICE: Shoot first, ask questions later.
BAD ADVICE: Always wear a clean pair of panties.
GOOD ADVICE: Go commando: save water, save the earth.
BAD ADVICE: Drink in moderation.
GOOD ADVICE: Drink up, bitches! You only live once!
But seriously, y'all. If you ever ASK ME a question and I take the time out of my busy fucking life to answer you, take that shit to heart.
That is all.
BAD ADVICE: Just be yourself.