Who done it?!
The paranormal shit in our house is totally out of fucking control. Now, when a door is supposed to be locked and isn't.... or water is left running in the kitchen... or closet lights are left on all day... or dog hair is mysteriously all over the sofa... or the thermostat is supposed to be on 72 and instead is on 70... we all blame the damn ghost because NOBODY else "did it". The ghost is fucking with us, I think. Because nothing irks Hubber like someone jacking with his A/C thermostat. Well, accept for maybe me poking him in his arm pit.... or someone parking in front of the mailbox... or dog shit in the front yard... or empty wine glasses. Oh, wait. Forget that last one. That's one of mine. I think we need to set a trap and nip this ghost shit in the butt once and for all. Too bad that little squeaky lady from Poltergiest died...she would have been an awesome trap setter!