Buses, Booze and Fruit Roll-Ups
The youngest spawn thinks that all the cool kids ride the bus. But, to torture her, I forbade it. I insisted that I drop her off every morning... waiting in the car line for 10-15 excrutiating minutes behind idiot parents that can't read/see/hear, just so that I can watch her walk into the building. It gave me the assurance that she actually made it to school and that she didn't skip out to drink Boone's Farm Strawberry Hill and smoke Camel cigarettes behind the school with all the other derelicts. But it wasn't until a few days ago that I realized that the piece of mind I get from dropping her off myself isn't worth the time and aggravation it costs me to deal with the dreaded CAR LINE. Also, I got banned from the car line for shooting the bird at the crossing guard. Twice.
Me: Hey, baby... wouldn't it be fun to ride the bus in the mornings?
Spawn: Really?! Yes!! I can sneak in some fruit roll-up so me and Tyler can eat them together BEFORE the teacher takes them away from us!
Me: You can eat on the bus?
Spawn: No. I mean, yes.
Me: Whatever... just don't get in trouble!
So, she's been catching the bus every morning this week and so far she hasn't gotten in trouble for sneaking contraband onto school property. How much harm can fruit roll-ups cause, really?