I laugh in the face of stupid writing!

For today's blog, let us take a look at a few online ads for writing gigs. We'll start with this one:

I don't need time wasters, either, honey!  And, you just wasted MY time with this jacked-up ad.  What the fuck is "mix words"?  And why do you assume everyone reading your piece of shit ad is a GUY?  And what's with your requirement for "perfect English"?  YOU are going to judge MY English?  I don't think so.  Also, you're a jackass for thinking that $0.01/word is an excellent rate.  ONE CENT. This ain't the Phillipines!

Moving right along, let's check out this one:

I have a problem with every other fucking word in this ad. What you need is SOME writer to proofread your ads before posting.  Research thinks?  Huh?

"Please let me know with the starting work as "SEVEN"." Uhm. WTF are you talking about?  So far, 14 people have bid under budget on this job.  I am shocked.

Finally, there's this one:

This person likes UNIQUE stuff, that's for sure.  What IS a unique, original writer?  Aren't we ALL unique and original?  I ain't writing 1 page for this weirdo, much less 10.  He/she is probably the dope fiend that got Roger Clemens in trouble.  No thanks.  I have a reputation to uphold, people.

******************* update**************************
You heifers need to quit pointing out the fact that I didn't proofread this entry before posting it!  You can all suck my left tit! Bitches.